I'm been pretty proud of all I have accomplished today. My son has had a rash (that makes his skin feel like a pickle, so hereafter he will be referred to as Mr. Pickle) for about a week now. The doctor said he was probably contagious and not to have him around other children, therefore no church and no cousin birthday party. Sad.
Thus, I cleaned. I swept and dusted Mr. Pickle's room, I swept the entryway, I decluttered and cleaned the bathroom, and with some help, I moved my desk out of our bedroom. That's a lot for a Sunday.
I also tried to up my water intake today. I had filled our filtered water pitcher, so it was all ready to go for the day. I drank several glasses. I even refilled the pitcher.
Then tonight, when I went to fill up my glass once again, I saw it. Something floating in the water. Hanging from the filter. That's when I realized two things.
1. Something was growing in my filtered water pitcher.
And, 2. I had been drinking water all day that had touched that "growth."
I guess they're serious when they say you ought to replace your water filter every few months. 'Course, I'm the girl that didn't replace my vacuum filter for oh, about two years.
I think I'll take my chances with unfiltered water until I get that filter replaced...
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Happy Anniversary, Soldier of Mine!
June 2, 2007
The sun was shining and the birds were singing. Quite literally. It was the perfect day for a wedding. On that special day, four years ago, I married my best friend. For the first time, my husband is not here beside me to celebrate our anniversary. As I reflect on that day, I have to laugh a bit at our vows. I love the vows we chose. It's just that I had no idea on that day how true those words would be. And how difficult those words would be to live out. Still, as I reread portions of our wedding ceremony, I find my strength renewed.
Our Wedding Vows
{My Husband}
"I choose you to be my partner in love and in life. The Lord instructs me to be the one who is the head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the church [Ephesians 5:23].
I take you to be no other than whom God has created you to be
Loving what I know of you
Trusting what I do not yet know
With respect for your integrity
And faith in your love for me
Through all our years
And in all that life may bring us
It is my desire and delight to be your leader and love you as Christ loves the church. With all my heart, I make this solemn vow to you before God."
{Me}
"I choose you to be my partner in love and in life. The Lord instructs me as the one who will be your wife to submit to you as unto Him [Ephesians 5:22].
I take you to be no other than whom God has created you to be
Loving what I know of you
Trusting what I do not yet know
With respect for your integrity
And faith in your love for me
Through all our years
And in all that life may bring us
It is my desire and delight to be your helper as Our Father created woman to be [Genesis 2:18].
With all my heart, I make this solemn vow to you before God."
A Special Reading
"Joy is love singing
Peace is love resting
Longsuffering is love enduring
Gentleness is love's true touch
Goodness is love's character
Faithfulness is love's habit
Meekness is love's self-forgetfulness
Self-control is love holding the reins"
(Donald G. Barnhouse)
Ring Exchange
{Same for us both}
"With this ring, I thee wed: with my heart, I thee honor, with my soul, I thee love."
{Irish} Blessing
"May God give you...
For every storm, a rainbow,
For every tear, a smile,
For every care, a promise,
And a blessing in each trial."
The sun was shining and the birds were singing. Quite literally. It was the perfect day for a wedding. On that special day, four years ago, I married my best friend. For the first time, my husband is not here beside me to celebrate our anniversary. As I reflect on that day, I have to laugh a bit at our vows. I love the vows we chose. It's just that I had no idea on that day how true those words would be. And how difficult those words would be to live out. Still, as I reread portions of our wedding ceremony, I find my strength renewed.
Our Wedding Vows
{My Husband}
"I choose you to be my partner in love and in life. The Lord instructs me to be the one who is the head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the church [Ephesians 5:23].
I take you to be no other than whom God has created you to be
Loving what I know of you
Trusting what I do not yet know
With respect for your integrity
And faith in your love for me
Through all our years
And in all that life may bring us
It is my desire and delight to be your leader and love you as Christ loves the church. With all my heart, I make this solemn vow to you before God."
{Me}
"I choose you to be my partner in love and in life. The Lord instructs me as the one who will be your wife to submit to you as unto Him [Ephesians 5:22].
I take you to be no other than whom God has created you to be
Loving what I know of you
Trusting what I do not yet know
With respect for your integrity
And faith in your love for me
Through all our years
And in all that life may bring us
It is my desire and delight to be your helper as Our Father created woman to be [Genesis 2:18].
With all my heart, I make this solemn vow to you before God."
A Special Reading
"Joy is love singing
Peace is love resting
Longsuffering is love enduring
Gentleness is love's true touch
Goodness is love's character
Faithfulness is love's habit
Meekness is love's self-forgetfulness
Self-control is love holding the reins"
(Donald G. Barnhouse)
Ring Exchange
{Same for us both}
"With this ring, I thee wed: with my heart, I thee honor, with my soul, I thee love."
{Irish} Blessing
"May God give you...
For every storm, a rainbow,
For every tear, a smile,
For every care, a promise,
And a blessing in each trial."
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Life is Short
"Life is short. Eat dessert first."~Jacques Torres
My son is a true believer in this. Apparently.
He started crying at 6:45AM. I stumbled out of bed, went to his room, picked him up, went back to my room, and stuck him in bed with me to try to coax another half hour or more out of him.
At 7:15AM, he woke up again. STARVING. I threw him {gently} over the side of my bed thinking that he would follow me into the kitchen as I made his breakfast. He didn't.
After making his cereal and yogurt, I went back to my bedroom to see what the hold-up was. It seems he couldn't wait for me to MAKE breakfast.
There on my wood floors sat a small boy, legs out, hand in mouth...with a container of Golden Oreos perched on his lap. He gave me this look like, "Well? Something had to be done. My tummy was rumbling."
My son is a true believer in this. Apparently.
He started crying at 6:45AM. I stumbled out of bed, went to his room, picked him up, went back to my room, and stuck him in bed with me to try to coax another half hour or more out of him.
At 7:15AM, he woke up again. STARVING. I threw him {gently} over the side of my bed thinking that he would follow me into the kitchen as I made his breakfast. He didn't.
After making his cereal and yogurt, I went back to my bedroom to see what the hold-up was. It seems he couldn't wait for me to MAKE breakfast.
There on my wood floors sat a small boy, legs out, hand in mouth...with a container of Golden Oreos perched on his lap. He gave me this look like, "Well? Something had to be done. My tummy was rumbling."
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Broken Record
*Inside the confessional booth...beware ;) *
Here we go:
I'm tired of fighting the same battles day after day. Depression, dishes, routines, repairs, weight gain, worry...when does it end??
I know the answer. In Heaven. For now, however, I'm on Earth. I need a plan. A way to cope. Renewed strengh to keep fighting. I need some holiness in my day.
Holy=Set Apart
Of course, this generally means "set apart [for God's purpose]," so we typically think of Sundays, churches, etc. But, I need certain times of my day set apart for other specific purposes. And I need those times to be protected. Right now, I have theoretically set aside time to do my Bible study, to take my medication, to wash dishes, and so on, but I do not protect these times of day. I let other things interfere so frequently that these routines are little more than theory. They need to be put into practice. Daily. While I often need the motivation to get started, even more desperately, I need the discipline and perseverance to keep me going.
So maybe I already know how to win the battles of mental, physical, and emotional clutter. Maybe I already know the plan. I just need to pour my energy into fighting to protect those times of day set apart for activities that will help me win these battles. I need to pray over these times of day, these routines and activities, and pray against distraction.
And C, I'm gonna need that holy water!
Here we go:
I'm tired of fighting the same battles day after day. Depression, dishes, routines, repairs, weight gain, worry...when does it end??
I know the answer. In Heaven. For now, however, I'm on Earth. I need a plan. A way to cope. Renewed strengh to keep fighting. I need some holiness in my day.
Holy=Set Apart
Of course, this generally means "set apart [for God's purpose]," so we typically think of Sundays, churches, etc. But, I need certain times of my day set apart for other specific purposes. And I need those times to be protected. Right now, I have theoretically set aside time to do my Bible study, to take my medication, to wash dishes, and so on, but I do not protect these times of day. I let other things interfere so frequently that these routines are little more than theory. They need to be put into practice. Daily. While I often need the motivation to get started, even more desperately, I need the discipline and perseverance to keep me going.
So maybe I already know how to win the battles of mental, physical, and emotional clutter. Maybe I already know the plan. I just need to pour my energy into fighting to protect those times of day set apart for activities that will help me win these battles. I need to pray over these times of day, these routines and activities, and pray against distraction.
And C, I'm gonna need that holy water!
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Girl, Interrupted
At the beginning of this year...and again when my husband's training began...I made some promises to myself. Resolutions encouraging change. It's now March and you may be wondering how it is going.
Well. My progress keeps getting interrupted. LIFE continues to interrupt me. C'est la vie!
Eating well? All but thrown out the window lately. Working out? Haven't seen the inside of the gym for a month or so. Reading? Haven't been consistent with my Bible study since January. Or my other reading for that matter. Cleaning? Eh, it comes and goes. Morning and evening routines? Very sparse. Losing weight? Ha. I've gained back some weight. I'm staying steady around 140 pounds, so at least it's down from 148, but it's up from the 137.5 I had gotten down to.
So...I think you get the picture. There have been many things interfering with my many resolutions, but I've also tried to take on too much.
I recognize this place. I've been here before. MANY times. The question now is where do I go from here? How can I do better? I'm tired of always taking a left and going around and around.
"Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."~Albert Einstein
Let's face it. This guy was a genius. Presumably, he knows what he's talking about. But what can I do differently to obtain the results I expect and thus regain my sanity? Maybe take a right instead this time?
Two words come to mind: baby steps. *Sigh* What does this mean? What does it look like? Where do I start?
Whoever thinks being a stay-at-home mom is easy has clearly never undertaken the job themselves.
{Special thanks to thinkexist.com}
Well. My progress keeps getting interrupted. LIFE continues to interrupt me. C'est la vie!
Eating well? All but thrown out the window lately. Working out? Haven't seen the inside of the gym for a month or so. Reading? Haven't been consistent with my Bible study since January. Or my other reading for that matter. Cleaning? Eh, it comes and goes. Morning and evening routines? Very sparse. Losing weight? Ha. I've gained back some weight. I'm staying steady around 140 pounds, so at least it's down from 148, but it's up from the 137.5 I had gotten down to.
So...I think you get the picture. There have been many things interfering with my many resolutions, but I've also tried to take on too much.
I recognize this place. I've been here before. MANY times. The question now is where do I go from here? How can I do better? I'm tired of always taking a left and going around and around.
"Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."~Albert Einstein
Let's face it. This guy was a genius. Presumably, he knows what he's talking about. But what can I do differently to obtain the results I expect and thus regain my sanity? Maybe take a right instead this time?
Two words come to mind: baby steps. *Sigh* What does this mean? What does it look like? Where do I start?
Whoever thinks being a stay-at-home mom is easy has clearly never undertaken the job themselves.
{Special thanks to thinkexist.com}
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Smooth
A few days ago, I decided that the buck stops here. It had been two weeks since my husband left and our son was still not sleeping through the night in his own bed. His ear infection had cleared up, so it was a good time to break the habit. But, it's a process, of course.
The first night went well. I spent 20 minutes around 5AM firmly, but reassuringly, coaxing my son back to sleep in his own bed. Without much fuss, he caved and slept until 7:15AM in his own bed! The next night didn't go quite as well. To make a long story short, it involved paranoia and the realization that I had to break myself of the habit of having him in bed with me as much as I had to break him of the habit. Third time's a charm, right?
Actually, yes! Last night, I set my alarm for 6AM to jumpstart my morning routine. (I had to drop my normal morning routine due to the new sleeping arrangements) I heard that alarm go off this morning and I was confused. As I slowly woke up, I realized the alarm was the starter pistol to my morning routine. My son had slept through the night. In his own bed. ALL night. My first thought was "Hallelujah!" Quickly followed by, "Oh my gosh, is he alive?!" After listening outside his door and hearing his soft baby snores, I breathed a sigh of atonished relief. The Hallelujah chorus rang in my head.
I went about my morning routine and when I came to the portion of time designated to "get dressed to [my] shoes," I stopped short. The outfit I needed to wear was out in my car. No big deal. I mentally reminded myself to turn off the alarm so as not to wake my son and put on my shoes. I opened the front door and was immediately blind. I froze and tried to collect my thoughts. An unbelievably loud sound shook the house and reverberated in my ears. I raced to the alarm pad and frantically punched in the code praying it would bring silence before my eardrums burst. Finally, piercing silence reigned while utter chaos resounded in my head. As my heart raced, I aimed my hearing toward my son's room, sure that screams would be coming from that direction. Nothing. Just piercing silence. Confused and still a bit disoriented, I made my way to my son's room. Again nothing. I opened the door and all I heard was the soft purr of baby snores.
The scene from Mr. Holland's Opus with the firetruck horn and the sleeping baby in the stroller quickly replayed in my mind. How could I not notice if my son were deaf? My phone rang and I jumped. I retrieved it from the bedroom and gave the alarm company the necessary information which tells them "No, there's no emergency. It's just silly me!" As soon as I spoke aloud, my son began to cry. "So he's not deaf!" I rejoiced in my heart. "Smoooooth...now he's awake and I haven't even finished my routine."
Thankfully, after some prodding, he did go back to sleep and allowed me to finish my routine. In fact, he's still asleep. Maybe I should go listen for those baby snores...
The first night went well. I spent 20 minutes around 5AM firmly, but reassuringly, coaxing my son back to sleep in his own bed. Without much fuss, he caved and slept until 7:15AM in his own bed! The next night didn't go quite as well. To make a long story short, it involved paranoia and the realization that I had to break myself of the habit of having him in bed with me as much as I had to break him of the habit. Third time's a charm, right?
Actually, yes! Last night, I set my alarm for 6AM to jumpstart my morning routine. (I had to drop my normal morning routine due to the new sleeping arrangements) I heard that alarm go off this morning and I was confused. As I slowly woke up, I realized the alarm was the starter pistol to my morning routine. My son had slept through the night. In his own bed. ALL night. My first thought was "Hallelujah!" Quickly followed by, "Oh my gosh, is he alive?!" After listening outside his door and hearing his soft baby snores, I breathed a sigh of atonished relief. The Hallelujah chorus rang in my head.
I went about my morning routine and when I came to the portion of time designated to "get dressed to [my] shoes," I stopped short. The outfit I needed to wear was out in my car. No big deal. I mentally reminded myself to turn off the alarm so as not to wake my son and put on my shoes. I opened the front door and was immediately blind. I froze and tried to collect my thoughts. An unbelievably loud sound shook the house and reverberated in my ears. I raced to the alarm pad and frantically punched in the code praying it would bring silence before my eardrums burst. Finally, piercing silence reigned while utter chaos resounded in my head. As my heart raced, I aimed my hearing toward my son's room, sure that screams would be coming from that direction. Nothing. Just piercing silence. Confused and still a bit disoriented, I made my way to my son's room. Again nothing. I opened the door and all I heard was the soft purr of baby snores.
The scene from Mr. Holland's Opus with the firetruck horn and the sleeping baby in the stroller quickly replayed in my mind. How could I not notice if my son were deaf? My phone rang and I jumped. I retrieved it from the bedroom and gave the alarm company the necessary information which tells them "No, there's no emergency. It's just silly me!" As soon as I spoke aloud, my son began to cry. "So he's not deaf!" I rejoiced in my heart. "Smoooooth...now he's awake and I haven't even finished my routine."
Thankfully, after some prodding, he did go back to sleep and allowed me to finish my routine. In fact, he's still asleep. Maybe I should go listen for those baby snores...
Friday, February 25, 2011
Happy Birthday, Baby Boy!
One year ago today, I employed some different labor-inducing techniques to try to avoid an induction (which was to take place the following morning). The "trick" worked and my contractions became regular, so my OBGYN admitted me. I did what I could to get my labor to progress, but grew tired and decided to sleep instead (while I still had the chance!).
The next morning, I had barely progressed and finally, the decision was made to induce. I tried my hardest to do without any pain meds, but after half an hour on the pitocin, I opted for an epidural. The anethesiologist was in a c-section and unable to attend to me, so they gave me some other pain meds. All those did was make me dizzy! I grew very, um, impatient for the epidural, but after two hours on pitocin, I finally got my epidural. All I remember was trying to be as still as possible as he inserted the freakishly long needle into my spine. Then, I fell asleep. I vaguely remember being aware of Gilmore Girls being on TV, but I slept pretty hard.
When I woke up, the nurse asked me if I was ready to have a baby. I wasn't even fully awake yet! Panic set in, but excitement took over. Of course I was ready to meet my handsome boy!
So, at 12:42PM, my 7 lb. 13 oz. bundle of joy entered the world. I know everyone says it's love at first sight, but honestly, all I remember thinking was, "Aww, what a cute baby. But, that's not my baby. You guys did some kind of magic trick. No way was that beautiful baby inside my uterus just a few minutes ago!"
The whole experience was absolutely surreal. But, how I loved that little boy.
The hours that followed were a mixture of sadness {my husband was unable to come home from Army training} and joy as we got to know this little soul.
Truthfully, it was a rough time, emotionally, in my life. I was estranged from a couple of friends, my husband missed out on the birth and the first week of our son's life, and to top it off, postpartum depression hit me hard.
Yet, "for this child, I have prayed." {1 Samuel 1:27} After two {very early} miscarriages, I had carried this baby to full term. After being diagnosed with incompetent cervix and having an emergency cerclage at 19 weeks, I had carried this baby to full term. After 20 weekly shots of progesterone to help me hold the pregnancy, I had carried this baby to full term. With my husband away at Army Basic and training, I had carried this baby to full term. Thanks to my God and my family and friends, I had carried this baby to full term. At the end of the day, all that mattered was that our son had arrived safely. He was strong, healthy, intelligent, and handsome; EVERYTHING I had prayed for.
And yes, it was worth it all.
The next morning, I had barely progressed and finally, the decision was made to induce. I tried my hardest to do without any pain meds, but after half an hour on the pitocin, I opted for an epidural. The anethesiologist was in a c-section and unable to attend to me, so they gave me some other pain meds. All those did was make me dizzy! I grew very, um, impatient for the epidural, but after two hours on pitocin, I finally got my epidural. All I remember was trying to be as still as possible as he inserted the freakishly long needle into my spine. Then, I fell asleep. I vaguely remember being aware of Gilmore Girls being on TV, but I slept pretty hard.
When I woke up, the nurse asked me if I was ready to have a baby. I wasn't even fully awake yet! Panic set in, but excitement took over. Of course I was ready to meet my handsome boy!
So, at 12:42PM, my 7 lb. 13 oz. bundle of joy entered the world. I know everyone says it's love at first sight, but honestly, all I remember thinking was, "Aww, what a cute baby. But, that's not my baby. You guys did some kind of magic trick. No way was that beautiful baby inside my uterus just a few minutes ago!"
The whole experience was absolutely surreal. But, how I loved that little boy.
The hours that followed were a mixture of sadness {my husband was unable to come home from Army training} and joy as we got to know this little soul.
Truthfully, it was a rough time, emotionally, in my life. I was estranged from a couple of friends, my husband missed out on the birth and the first week of our son's life, and to top it off, postpartum depression hit me hard.
Yet, "for this child, I have prayed." {1 Samuel 1:27} After two {very early} miscarriages, I had carried this baby to full term. After being diagnosed with incompetent cervix and having an emergency cerclage at 19 weeks, I had carried this baby to full term. After 20 weekly shots of progesterone to help me hold the pregnancy, I had carried this baby to full term. With my husband away at Army Basic and training, I had carried this baby to full term. Thanks to my God and my family and friends, I had carried this baby to full term. At the end of the day, all that mattered was that our son had arrived safely. He was strong, healthy, intelligent, and handsome; EVERYTHING I had prayed for.
And yes, it was worth it all.
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